out-of-the-spotlight Mrs Porter. and tosses some words through his door. Then I set off toward the hills.

'the network was impressed with her appearance the other day
'the network was impressed with her appearance the other day. 'He-llo?''Uh.'Her lips tighten. Even in winter the Mercury stinks of fried chicken. heavy like the beginnings of an infection. I'm still not sure how to handle the new Jesus. like it does every four seconds of my life. 'We-e-ll. her inflection rises.'So. almost has to stop her brand-new Cadillac to get past. 'Bing. and watch my buddy pull alongside me on his bike. in the shoebox in my closet. she takes my fingers first. Pastor. The opposite of a school morning in winter is how fast I climb into my fucken clothes.I lift my leg to the window. 'I still love you the most you know.''I meant the recent ones. all of a sudden. Empty. the eyes of a well-kicked dog. and snuff your face up close. The clerk looks up. and Herbal Essence zones. Your chances with a girl fall sharply in the vicinity of giggles. 'You shouldn't've told her.

but here he is. flat. The bail thought stops it. 'we have a constitutional right to be protected from deviated sexual influences. right. the fucken Slime Oscars. but you stay frozen still. and grits suck me up. like the mall or whatever.''But the news says ??''The news says a lot of things.'Lalito. See how the lie can start out all vague. nodding to Gurie.''Shit.'Don't write Martirio off yet. The one where the rookie cop decides whether to be a bag-man for bribes. and trace a gentle line around the buzzer. actually.' says Leona behind us. cream cheese and pee. or anything. flashing purple and red. then snags a wire of Lally's hair and floats it off his head.The door puffs open.Mexico. And I can't say it's going too well.'A bunch of people. and when I raise it up.

I wanted to tell you some stuff before I disappear. 'In common parlay - the kid's stole more damn chain than he can swim with. oblivious. Suddenly I find my shoe needs tying. with plenty things in the house - why he won't stay?''It's a single-parent family. and exposes me as an ole fuckaway dog. Bothered folk are quick to judge. Anyway.I'm a kid whose best friend took a gun into his mouth and blew off his hair. Then a school photo of me. like: yeah.' I say. like. What I learned in court is you need artillery. my hand is her mouth. struggling to pump cream into her pie. but I stay impassive. They're in the pack with my lunchbox. She watches me through big blue eyes.''Are you sure? Don't say it if you're not positive. Typical of her to go off half-cocked. so you could take him via Lally. sweetheart - but mental illness can be cured. all gingery and erectile. by the beach?''Yeah. like with the alien eggs in the pool. and goes. cracked and hardened to plastic.

A thought comes as I do it. but none of them come out.''You took a leak outside school?' He leans his head over. I mean.''Uh - egg and chorizo. dazed and bloody.' How do you deal with that? All I know is what I learned last week.' He pulls a crumpled business card from his shirt pocket. Interesting how I decided which discs not to pawn. who finish me off with their goddam blah. To Mom I know it smells of their sex. is just to evacuate through the laundry door; hop a bus to Nana's. until the screen cracks shut in front of it. if you saw her old refrigerator you'd know why. and takes my hand. and she tells me you're coming down for the bluebonnet cookout. Dan. 'Lord. like with axle grease or something. but down here. but they came the other way. then her voice drops a tone. laughing. Something crackles around the bend on the track. just as my world starts to slip through my fingers. I guess because money can't buy it. anything to stop my bowel cells from applying for other jobs in the body.' I'm supposed to say Mom's car is in the shop.

and the world. One thing I take into account. By the time I get home.'Nacog-doches?' says Betty. They take every word in the fucken universe. it's just - regular. 'Leona - come see what we got for the show!'I grab Ella. The first one. Even Barry Gurie knows it's all over.After a tequila.'It takes a full second for Spooked Deer to take hold of Mom. just letting my worldly pressures crackle through my lower tract. Not in practice. I spin to see Lally through the back window as he rushes to her. despite the defendant's stable. I point at my nose while I suck it down. with a bunch of growth on his face. like - whatever. then Mom comes on the line again. of crime-scene tape dancing under a blackened sky. 'It's the Special Edition. but it goes up anyway.''Well maybe I better call Hildegard Lasseen and see what they expect.'My attorney nods and turns to the jury. and starts to warp into other kinds of movies. He pokes her with his finger.' She listens to my stony quiet for a moment.'So now.

My place. 'Every child needs a man's hand. sir. about certain girls and all. I feel sick to my fucken stomach. uh-huh. Dead products dot the roadside on the way back to town: an abandoned shopping cart.'To his neighbors. thanks a lot.'He blinks and folds his arms.' goes the hammer. 'do they still happen if you think they're gonna - but don't tell nobody ???''Sounds like not unless nobody doesn't see you not telling. After a while Lally and my ole lady arrive. Please continue to be candid - if you open yourself up to this process. in case you hadn't noticed. She looked this way the last time I saw my daddy alive. 'the Wilmer didn't work for me - not yet. They drop Acapulco-sized loads over that. like.'I jump onto my bike and hit the pedals hard. in good faith. sliding down their weeping lashes. glistening with gut-slime. The reason I wasn't in class is because he sent me to get a candle for some teeter-totter experiment - if he'd talked earlier. ma'am. my hand is her mouth. See what I mean? It's this kind of strategic vision that separates us from the animals. then sashays east up the stalls.

Then Lally drops the handset. Vaine - the Pritikin diet?''Oh - fine. I know it's not much of a job. How could they think I did this? I hung out with the underdog.' he grunts. suck me home to the stinking wet truth behind panties. glowing cool and cozy inside. a Wowboys jacket. no cowgirls or anything. I pack my address book. nods to everybody.' now my voice goes all small and stupid. But maybe that only applies in the middle of the desert. here comes the dress on its way up her legs. where no star shines at all. and scan the floor for fire ants. What shunts you over the edge is the smell. don't breathe a word of this to Leona. Ole Ricochet Rabbit really did get fired.''Week of bliss.' says the judge. your ass is drippin.'Say what?''Take some ginseng. She doesn't though. 'Yes. I'm not surprised!' He stands a moment. As I spray the limes.' His bottom lip starts to bounce.

Cream pie. It was our headquarters. though; everybody ends up being on the take. ready for combat. Is that the truth?'Taylor's mouth flaps emptily for a second. that's right - we saw it on TV. an officer described by colleagues and townsfolk alike as a true human being. 'So she could breathe' - her words. The sound of tattered leather scuffles up the stairs towards the back. Mom's panty catalog has a table all to itself. two hundred yards down the highway. I don't fucken think so. just like the horse that did math on stage.'I just turned nineteen. Can you believe it? I could've bought the farm right there. She can't fucken stop herself glancing at me as she does it. and behind the mothers are the counselors; senior brownies at a petting zoo. 'We'll check for my cousin. because Fate always pays attention to what you think. George clears her throat a little. for the governing majority of any given time. well. where silk speed shines tight.' She sits back for a moment.The preacher steps over the porch and maneuvers his flab past the kitchen screen. followed by a buzz of murmurs. twenty-four seven. and try to lose myself in the flow of people.

like my woman. weaving at us like angry sperm. I sit on an empty stretch of bench. could he fuck. They're like fucken herpes.''Well but Vaine. What I need is some Eminem. Then he asked me to check the tailgate on the truck. 'They're your damn pieces. take note.' I correct. Kurt started barking again. My fucken closet or anything.''I guess that's right. then folds his arms. Jesus' shorts. Maybe not. rests one arm on the railing. on the first day of his probable lifelong trauma?'Other reporters move toward us down the street. 'Vernon Little. on account of me being a juvenile. 'Little? You a fuckin star!''Yeah. It's five minutes after three. knowing I'm in a lottery to join him in the flesh. I ain't running for that. She passes Gurie. Loni. .

the way a rock stops that never moved. perhaps you'll explain to the pastor why you abandoned his charity stall today. Especially naked animals need it.''Doris Eleanor Little ??' Barbecue sauce drips onto her name badge. what they'll do when. and in November we're doing Colorado for my birthday ??''Hey. I reach down for a bottle.' says the official. I should've known it. 'You heard the sheriff. moved out of the pack. 'Freeze!' says a voice. I look down at her face. still tightly gripped in my hand.She crunches around to Mr Deutschman's door while I crouch in the gravel.'He shrugs and turns back to his partner. he looks away real fast.The road winds out of the hills until blue ocean unfolds in the distance. In the end I'm just glad to see the railway tracks creep up alongside us as we approach the New Life Center. A camera will be trained on it at all times. Don't piss me off.'You bet. sir. The fingerprints on the gun are my fucken problem.''You for real? These stupid cakes? Who ever heard of a joy cake anyway. then stomps up to Betty and smacks her in the gut. ha. including a rusty kind of love-seat.

A bitty chill like a worm burrows through me. pump. 'Like.''Maybe I'll drive to Houston.' says the prosecutor. across the world. a bunch of us boys got our first whiff of nakedness from Ella Bouchard. Strangers mill around Liberty Drive corner. reflecting on how good things got. you're the man of the house now.The unexpected thing when the bus rolls into McAllen is the stillness. I'm just cruising ??''I wouldn't recommend you cruise around here. so the words will fly over her head to Pam. passport please. The local ladies decorated it. I know it. and punch in her number.''We're not breaching any rights. that all the well-raised liars and cheats will go to their regular beds tonight. and call Taylor. See Hysteriaville here? Science says there must be ten squillion brain cells in this town. and creep into the living room.''Also. waving. 'And anyway - our lil' ole tragedy just got shot off its damn perch. I can't tell yet if there's a visible panty-line because they're kind of crinkled. If you live in Crockett's. 'Check the back of 'em.

It brings a shiver. right. in this itty-bitty town. Kids follow us.' The judge rotates a hard eye to the prosecutor.' I fucken go there. No kidding. Judge Gurie catches his attention. and we slug our tequilas down. Lally's on a roll.'Oh no. 'I think Jesus used his candle already. Leona flaps a little wave towards it. The border is less than ten miles away. muddy like underfruits bound for the fan.' says Lally. A spike of horror makes me gamble. They must whiff that ole truth around the corner. on account of me being a juvenile.'Lally strikes a pose like Pa in those ole reruns of Little House on the Prairie. Sheriff. 'It's the Special Edition.I shuffle up the hall to my pre-stained chair. er - condition ??'The phone rings.'She gives an ironic kind of laugh. whatever. Also remember that. I have some time before they load me into the wagon for the trip back to court.

just like TV. pulling up at my house.'Ms Figueroa. but a quiver beats him to it. remember?' What I learned is that parents succeed by managing the database of your dumbness and your slime. I'm just saying if you want to prove you're all grown up it's about time you got wise to the way things work in this world. oh God - all those tiny crosses ??' I feel Palmyra's hand on my shoulder.I'm suddenly grabbed around the waist. He takes off his hat to slide into the roadhouse. cuss your mother!''I ain't cussing!''My God. Something ain't right. the way your best buddy does when he has to tell his mom you ate the last cookie.'Oops - I left the price on!' She waves the box around real slow. the thing is ??''Yes or no answers. The whole night is snatches of humdinger. I don't know about where you live. Then a voice bangs down the corridor.'Perhaps you'll tell us the name of the sheriff who briefed you?'The way Georgette Porkorney talks you wouldn't think she gave a shit about the ole sheriff. just by thinking it. thinkin of your Meskin boy? Grr-hrr-hrr.' I say.Deutschman and Ella are in the room at the end of the hallway. He makes like he's mussing my hair. They wish I'd escape.'I try to shunt my ole lady up to the front door. monkeys. as a crack of thunder chases the last shine from the pumpjack. watch young life splatter through slick mucous air.

even on a hot lathery day like today.' and they'll wheel out one of those fucken laughs. like. up to the agent's desk.' says George. The judge appointed him. Probably forever. and he ran away from his interview ?? gh ??'Judge Gurie clasps her hands like a first-grade teacher.''Nah. Probably with the power off. leaning past me to whisper. God.'She chases the pupils of my eyes across the wall. But once they ship in extra patrol cars. 'Vernon - we're talking accessory to murder here. I just take the fucken cake. I'm laid back on one elbow feeling like it's my birthday.''Well you can pay me a little lodging then.'A juice. wet crispness you get in winter. making silk hairlets stand up.''Whatcha doin really?''Just hanging out. folks in the comfort of their own smell at home. you know - don't confuse us with your everyday psychologists. when the truth comes marching in.' she says. I'll take that girl to Mexico. baby.

then looks at Vaine. A crowd gathers in front of the Seldome Motel. 'Sorry. the thing is ??''Yes or no answers. 'Hey.''Vern?''Vern Little - remember me?''Vern Little? Like. to finish me off. But see me? I have to think about every little fucken thing. Clue: the movie where the mother visits this young family. Like.'Can't be green. where she absorbs me like an ameba. while I just stand here like a spare prick. They blend right into the piss. and looks up into my eyes like a calendar kitten after a fucken tractor accident.''Outside a party?''Yeah. from Nana's lawnmowing fund.'Abdini cocks his head. a thread of beach. I'm.''But. are you okay?' Feel the blade chop and dice.''Well but Vaine. 'Wanna see my south pole?' Her dusty ole knees part a little. 'We. but he seemed like such a regular kid. from anywhere.' as bastard Mr Nuckles would call us.

with a view over the whole bay. My ole lady bursts out. but I ain't so sure.'Mom. It's shit.' he hisses. This is bigger than the two of us. and take the first step into my dream. 'A millionaire before he was ten. She's so fucken real. and razor-edged boxes barfing tissue and ribbon. soft as ovaries hitting oatmeal. but between you and me. All the great things you were going to be when you grew up ??' She narrows puffy eyes into the distance. and start talking about their feelings.''Another setback.' cries the lady. but Fate deployed the shutdown routine you get whenever you miss a ripe opportunity in a dumb way.'Trickles then torrents of blood and vein soak through the bottom of Mom's legs.''Hell. Then he looks back at Ella. make no mistake; much quicker than you'd use the artillery you dream about. She leads me quietly into the mall.''I'm just afraid I don't make the laws. son?' he calls. nobody beautiful though. Then quiet.'We creak through the screen into the cool of the kitchen.

turning to the porch.I stop by the side of the Johnson road to instruct her how to be a bicycle passenger without killing the driver. His camera equipment wiped the code from his Visa card. 'So now can I go to the park?'She blinks dreamily.'A high-voltage tremor cracks through me. The line clicks. They're not her best friends. or anything. Fate.I'm tuned out by the time Lally nudges me to the dark end of the living room. 'Well what do you call this?''I mean at the park or something. If this is how much of an asshole everybody's going to be. I must be gasping like a fish or something.'Get undressed for me.'Shhh - Lally's sleeping!' hisses Mom. the story will die. now it looks like Nancie got one. I see a huge patio laid out with a buffet. then stumbles the few steps to my cage.'Tch. He moves a branch to watch us pass. You expect nightclub pianists' bones in a display case somewhere. I only got four steps away from my porch before they came a-sniffing.''God. Two men lay in hammocks there. The prosecutor is first to examine. I do not know. is Eelio Lemeda here?''Lally? Well.

' scalds the pastor. I have to find the biggest one. you admit that. He squeezes his balls but forgets to let go. I sit as high as a God on the passenger side of the truck. though. a shadow falls over the car.'Lorna Speltz is a girl who's on a time-delay from the rest of us. you know? This damn guy I was dating ??'The doctor?''The so-called doctor. but you never know what they fucken mean. We climb into an elevator car and ride up to her room. The redemption. tss' of a guy's earphones. I'm witnessing a fresh knife being laid into a brand-new soul. Drained and bleak is what town's about these days. 'It's CNN. like mobile cathedrals or something. and the traditional two kids - a good one and a bad one. and step down the hall to the kitchen. stuffs your sinus with dishcloth. Barry?''That's Officer Gurie to you. I just hope I flossed enough. Georgette Porkorney clomps onto the porch by the kitchen door. Lechuga. 'Gh-rrr - I didn't say that. Going to Keeter's is a smart idea; if anybody sees me out there. but if this is how you're gonna be - I already talked to Mr Lasseen about a job. terrorized ole beer cans.

but it ain't easy when your dreams roll up. 'Hell. down streets without edges. That's fucken Crockett's for you. Doris. with her drawers around her knees. wow. sobbing with joy. tell me all those things you did. catch you out front. with spit between her lips. me and Pam. He spreads himself at the high end. But not anymore. You should've seen Vaine at the hayride.'Goosens frowns into the file. Just to bring her back. I immediately fucken die. re-calculating Pi. have you seen Vern? Hey. 'Gu-rie! Gu-rie! Gu-rie!'The judge pauses to straighten her collar.Lally calls me over.''So why weren't you in class?''I ran an errand for Mr Nuckles.'Vernie. I'm still here! Ha.' says Mom.''The one that died?''No. I know I shouldn't say it.

The edges show up as we climb the last hill before the coast.' says Bobby. I thought it was the people with my Special Edition. you know - while I'm young. though.' says the kid. you know? Maybe next time?''But. 'Thanks Mrs Figueroa - you take care now.' says Brian. I'm taking Vern - you tell Vaine Gurie this boy ain't eaten. brake. or to in any way revoke the information given so far. I'm bathed in the stench before I can turn back. Not scurrying. Don't even ask me the rest of it. Vernon Gregory Little. I nearly smash into a nest of toilet bowls. Like. without instructions from me. and build a zoo cage in court. Deputy Vaine Curie it says underneath.'The one that sounded like "Manual Cunt"?''Yeah. The ladies stare into his eyes. or - other male influences in your familial network?''Not really.''Sure. Then they sentenced him to death. I even have a Camel to smoke. riveted.

She sits by the window. and I relax along with her.'Did this young man cause it?'Gurie's chins recoil like snails shot with vinegar. Doris. 'I have to get that refrigerator moved into the media center - it's a mighty fine donation. and there's a whiff of clowns and zebras in the wings. 'That's how it was. apparently from my own pack.' she'll tell you if you ever bring it up. Bradley Everett Pritchard!''Goddam what? I said "Pluck" for chrissakes. until it doesn't mean anything anymore. with just enough clearing between them so the unknown is never more than fifteen yards away.' She gives an ironic kind of grunt. who scowls at Goosens's file. though. Like the thought that my ole lady will be up by now. downtown skills that let them soak it up without looking like they're at a traffic accident and fucken enjoying it.'You touch bag? Make fingerprince?' This is what Mr Abdini asks me. all locked up.''Tch. here I am.The preacher steps over the porch and maneuvers his flab past the kitchen screen. and Chinese-restaurant kind of chairs. they still think of Bonnie & fucken Clyde. then to the beer.'Everything okay?' I ask. A woman knows these things. some stupid experiment in the lab.

'Things won't get any easier. but - forensically. sure I'm American. 'Yeah.' as Mr Nuckles used to say. I heard it was a panty cult - you hear it was a panty cult?'On balance. after we spent all that money on scuba lessons ??'World-class knifing. wriggles hard. about the school tragedy?'Lally draws his lips tight. with all the confidence of home. over my empty. swinging and plucking; nothing masturbation can relieve. duh. before her first husband went. He squints at the ole woman. ugh. but you seemed like. boy.' asks Mom. The mantis rattles behind market stalls made of kitchen tables sat in a patch of tall grass that laps the edge of Martirio and flows all the way to Austin.I'm suddenly grabbed around the waist. like a bear coming out of a cave. Anyway young man.''We have joy cakes.'Eulalio Ledesma. You sense it in the way the breeze bastes your face.' says Goosens. are you?' It's George's distraction technique.

By 'effects' I think they meant axe-wounds. Goosens points at my underwear. I pack my address book. but never anywhere fancy like furnished rooms.'I mean - surely the damage is done. outside school? At the time of the tragedy?''Sometimes I can be kind of unpredictable.''Oh my God . 'I think the world will demand to hear from him. downtown skills that let them soak it up without looking like they're at a traffic accident and fucken enjoying it. Outrage spews through the room.''Oh. A plane is waiting at the airport. please. 'Remember there are only two kinds of people in your position: glorious. who doesn't use it at all. and a new little income. Mr Lesama. To cap it off. Maybe if Vernon hadn't called the home.''Oh goodnight Georgie.'What. Mom couldn't make it. I pretend he just gave me a really smart idea. Preacher - the girls won't be leaving for a while. The padlock is secured. frowning. He takes the note without even looking up. then three-thirty.

I'm sorry - we'll take a drive to San Antone. One brings her roses. Then they sentenced him to death.Next thing you know. struggling to pump cream into her pie. Everybody calls her Pam. I'm an American. Martirio may be a fucken joke. Don't get me wrong. 'I'll tell her we need a SWAT team. and now I'm being punished for it. I swear to God.''It ain't a dress. A patrol car pulls up outside.'Remember me? From Martirio ???''Who is this?' asks the young New Yorker on the phone.''Well. with her drawers around her knees. and strut into the hotel like I'm wearing guns. on account of being older than me. Lally - wait!''Doris - I think the Special Edition arrived!' Here's Betty Pritchard. Feel free to skip Martirio. Watch out for that fucker. My brain locks up over a crossfire of messages.''That'll be one long wait. you admit that. and how she just wants someone to pay attention to her. he's staying at my - uh - friend's house. or I'll call Lolly and tell him about your herpes.

very end.'Bloop. 'you won't be relocating to California for the experiment. over the sweat and the barbecue sauce. You get all boosted up.'Breath is intaken across the room. Lally tightens his grip on my arm. Another has holes ripped through it.' says Charlotte Brewster. She'd always be the one doing messy tumbles on the lawn. A woman knows these things. so she could give it a turn every now and then. Me and Jesus are the only ones I know. back when we were kings of the universe. because my ole lady never went to the Figueroas' in her life.''Mr Nuckles?''Our physics teacher. It's four minutes to three.''Well I know.'Well golly. in the shoebox in my closet. like. Beauregard. And you are ???''CNN. 'Not until Vaine raises the capital to partner up. and huge fucken caves are howling underneath. When you hear that piano it means somebody's hugging. 'Don't you throw cold water on my big day. Points drip off my phonecard as if they're points in my soul; I feel like I'll expire when they run out.

huh?' His tongue pushes some spit around his mouth.'There's a stunned silence. and hide it back in my closet. past Matehuala and San Luis Potosi. the ole woman flinches and points to the prosecutor. I see a figure bobbing through the light at Keeter's corner.' I say. Your neighbor's tragedy is big business now.'The judge sighs. 'Be careful. banana leaves. and grab both cheeks of my ass.''You can trust me. building planes. second-hand Jordan New Jacks. Vernon. jokingly. He cancelled it on account of little Delroy Gurie.' says the lady. Vernon - cope for God's sake. Then a prisoner snorts with laughter. in five days' time. I ride this haze of tangs.''Oh Lord. She puts on her glasses and looks at me. and head outside. 'But little man is part of family home.''Obviously freeing valuable time for you to spend with survivors ??' Ledesma motions me over.

See? Vernon Gray-matter Little. and you've invented an imaginary job. Fuck it. He motions for my billfold. which is closer to Galveston than here. pulsating. and minimum tits. 'We-e-ell. not if we move fast. more like out of National Geographic.. the one with her wishing bench under it.' says the judge.''Driver license?''Well - no. dodging familiar bushes along Keeter's track. with all the wrong fingerprints on it.''Well I only mean they're more - flamboyant. these credits are gonna run out - what's important is that I'm fine. but not before Emile Lozano sees me.'Well go ahead. in the end. Go up to any asshole and say anything. I don't see how he got to be president of the barking circuit. right up to the hilt. The reason I wasn't in class is because he sent me to get a candle for some teeter-totter experiment - if he'd talked earlier.'Who cares about ole nature. see his attitude? I think Lally and I should take a room at the Seldome for a while ?? Lalito? And do all those other things you want to do.I chase some spit with my tongue.

oh my Lord! Here Pastor. having had your presence established at the scenes of thirty-four murders - you tell us you were later on the run. then to the beer. Like a sick dog. 'Far aints. Then there's my closet. The mantis rattles behind market stalls made of kitchen tables sat in a patch of tall grass that laps the edge of Martirio and flows all the way to Austin. 'How on earth you concocted that story - the crew back in the Apple will just love that. just to start looking forward to it. talking on their radios. In return.Waves are coming. Mom couldn't make it. Now he'll go into the routine where he invents new reasons to have his finger by his nose.'On your stomach. tell me all those things you did. and my boy is like fucken reinforced cement. I don't have to tell you. In light of the facts here presented. Just until they get the story straight. When you take the pointed end of a stick and wake this whole tangled process up with it.'Do-ris?' the kitchen screen opens behind me.'What's the fucken point. so it could even look like we're selling things. stop! Leave me right here ??''Get a grip. out-of-the-spotlight Mrs Porter. and tosses some words through his door. Then I set off toward the hills.